A Joyful Girl

2012-01-27T20:33:00.000-05:00

First attempt at gluten and dairy free cookies (and soy... and etc...) is a success! They taste different but not bad different. Ralph had to leave the kitchen because he wanted more. That's a pretty good sign!

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Problem + Money = Solution

2012-01-21T10:53:00.000-05:00

-Trip to Boston to see your sister for the first time since her wedding in 2010 - $300+
-Cuisinart Food Processor that will minimize kitchen prep time - $170
My old one was a mini prep that only held about a cup's worth and let off a horrible motor burning smell after 5 seconds of use

-Cuisinart Hand Blender - $30

My old one had cracked housing, made a really disturbing noise and black liquid randomly leaked out while I was making my morning smoothie

-3 Spanx Bras that might be the most comfortable bra ever designed - $160

-Beads for earring making bought in Cambridge that will remind me of this week - $2

-Target exercise clothes, hat for Ave, some kitcheny things and a woven basket for all those vegetables - $170

-Pixie friendly hair products from bumble and bumble - $50

Buying stuff that makes your life easier because bad stuff like food allergies, dead babies and sports injuries keep happening to you - PRICELESS!!!!!!

Kisses for baby George!

2012-01-19T09:26:00.001-05:00

Whirlwind Boston trip with Jennie and Michael - and we saw Hannah G too!

This is outside the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston... "I saw great art and all I got you was this silly picture!"

Ho Hum

2012-01-17T19:36:00.001-05:00

I see that it has been a while since I have posted on the blog. I wish I had tales of adventure and excitement to bring to you... but the last couple weeks have involved a lot of prepping, chopping and dishwashing. Where oh where is a maid/personal chef/assistant when I need one??? Given the significant amount of time I had been spending in the kitchen preparing primarily whole food meals, I am quite surprised at how much more time I am now spending in the kitchen now as I adjust to my allergy free diet. I hope that I will get used to the new way sooner rather than later... and a larger food processor and more powerful hand blender (smoothies) is on its way to aid me in efficiency!

Last week, I spent an hour on the couch with chest tightness and fatigue after eating an apple - something I am not technically allergic to but it is a cross reactor to my very strong timothy hay allergy. So the grand banned total is now 10: barley, beef, chicken, garlic, shrimp, pork, wheat, dairy, soy... and apples! Plus I have my suspicions about turkey... but I haven't had a chance to test it again.

As managing my health has become its own part-time job, I have been trying to eliminate non-essential commitments from my life. One of those things will probably be this blog. I have been enjoying this radical idea of living my life and shutting up about it. I will post pictures to the blog from my phone as there are things worth sharing!

The Food Allergy Journey Begins: Skin Testing Results

2012-01-02T08:00:00.000-05:00

Barley, Beef, Chicken, Garlic Day

I thought of many titles for this post -

"If you were planning to invite me over for dinner, too late!"
"Potlucks are not my friend"
"I'm going to crawl into a hole and starve"
"Why didn't I eat an entire pizza when I had the chance?"

During the month of December, I had 4 rounds of skin testing done (2 for inhalants and 2 for skin) and a blood test for seafood/fish and nuts.

The first two weeks showed that I have quite strong nasal allergies to many many things. Getting dust mite covers for my bedding has already helped that headache stuffed up feeling I woke up with every morning. It was no surprise to me that I had a very strong reaction to Timothy hay and strong reactions to all grasses, most trees, etc. This issue I knew about. I almost couldn't get through this last summer... itchy eyes, headaches, sneezing, etc. Hence, the reason I asked for allergy testing.

Given that I also suffer from hives and almost always felt rather bad after I ate, the doctor also had me go through food allergy testing. The results were rather surprising and when I had my post-testing appointment, he opened my folder and said "Wow....."

I am officially allergic to Barley, Beef, Chicken, Garlic, Shrimp, Pork, Wheat, Soy and Dairy.

I have known about half that list for a couple weeks and the other half for one week. My emotions and coping abilities have fluctuated during that time. The meat allergies are rather straight forward to avoid. Barley and/or wheat are in all mainstream breads, muffins, cookies, cakes, etc including standard flours used in baking at home. Garlic is in anything that tastes good. Dairy is the love of my life. And soy is just plain everywhere.

There are foods left. I tested fine for eggs, corn, potatoes, rice... air. Oh wait - I didn't!!! (LOL. Ok, that wasn't even planned. Jokes on me!) Seriously, there really are plenty of foods left - vegetables, fruit, quinoa, salmon, nuts. But it was a bit of a shock to cut out so many things at once. Yes, just a bit.

After we got the bad news, Ralph said but you haven't had any symptoms... but I had been experiencing LOTS of symptoms, I just never tied them to food allergies. I think because I was allergic to so many things, there never was a pattern for me to catch onto - unless every meal is a pattern. I would try going without dairy, but still feel bad... I would try cutting out nuts, but still feel bad. Get the idea?

During the skin test, you experience the same symptoms you would if you had ingested the food - for me: itching/hives, chest tightness, fatigue. Since I have been avoiding everything on that list for 1 week, I already feel A LOT better. My bloating is vastly improved. My mood and energy level is really stable through the day. I have had fewer hives. My stomach has felt better. I used to get a lot of chest tightness or pressure, that I thought was anxiety related - nope! It was a mild anaphylactic reaction to food! So glad I didn't spend lots of money seeing a shrink... I don't think s/he could have helped me with that!

Remember the blood sugar experimenting I did earlier this year? I did all of that because of the fatigue I would feel 1 1/2 to 2 hours after most meals... and at home testing did show higher than expected blood sugar numbers. GET THIS! It wasn't prediabetes. Fatigue is a food allergy symptom. I did have a glucose challenge test at my doctor's office this summer which came back normal. I didn't know what to make of that because my numbers from the lab were much lower than my numbers at home. SO GET THIS! While having an anaphylactic response, your body dumps sugar into your system to help you. So my numbers during the test were fine because I am not allergic to sugar.... So I now have this to say: HEY LOCAL PA - Remember this summer when I said, something is WRONG WITH ME and I don't feel good after I EAT and I have been testing my numbers at home and they are HIGH - And you grudgingly agreed to give me a glucose challenge test WHILE NOT AT ALL SUBTLY implying that you thought I was just anorexic and should eat more - F*$& YOU. When I am able to say a more professional version of that to her directly, I will. Not ready yet obviously!

Deep breath.

So, I am supposed to avoid all these foods for at least 6 months. At that point the doctor is going to tell me to cautiously reintroduce garlic and at some point maybe the others. But he said that the rest of what I am allergic to - the meats, dairy, soy, wheat, barley - don't tend to reintroduce very well.

So I am wrapping my head around being a soy-free, wheat-free vegan who eats an egg at breakfast and turkey or salmon as needed for energy or family harmony... Wish me luck!

Hair Update: My Long Pixie

2011-12-28T19:18:00.003-05:00

Really terrible before picture.

Here is the wild before picture of my hair. Minimal product, mostly air dried, fluffed and frizzed for maximum "before" impact. The first four inches or so is natural texture and the rest is the Manetamer "straighter" hair. Pile of hair picture... the other half was all over me and my hair dresser.
Hope you like the afters below! Real life feedback has been very positive.

I took a picture of the back but accidentally deleted it. The back is very short - true pixie short. The longer top and bangs are new for me from the last time I went pixie short. Gives me more options and if I want to grow it out again, it won't take as long! With my natural curl, I did straighten the front and take some volume out of the sides. The back is short enough that it needs no attention. The after pictures are after I have slept on it, been at work, then at the gym lifting for an hour, plus I took a hat on and off... so it holds up quite nicely!

Christmas Day Ski

2011-12-25T18:30:00.001-05:00

Grocery Budget Dilemma: SOLVED.

2011-12-24T09:00:00.000-05:00

Problem: The rising cost of food ruins the joy of menu planning, eating and grocery shopping.

Why this matters: I really used to like all these things and then it got so expensive it made me sad. Being sad makes most people eat more. Then they have to go back to the grocery store. Vicious cycle.

Failed Solution #1: Ignore problem and just buy the food we need. (Still sad and floundering around like a stressed out... flounder.)

Failed Solution #2: Full scale anorexia attempt lasted 4 hours and 45 minutes. (Even sadder and hungry.)

Failed Solution #3: Buy cheaper food. (Super sad and having daydreams about red peppers.)

Solution: The "Daily" Food Budget.

On average, we have spent about $575/month for groceries for the 3 of us over the past few months. (This includes eating out which we do very rarely.) I settled on a daily food budget goal of $15-$20 per day which is $450-$600 for the month. Again, this includes out to eat and is the minimum amount that works for us with the types and amounts of food we eat. The point of this post is not how much you should spend but how to have FUN grocery shopping at whatever amount of spending that works for you.

I have included a picture of a fake calendar that I made up... but I will still try to describe it.

For every day I write the cumulative "Budget Amount" for that day in the month. I have been working with $15 but only filling it in a week at a time. That way if we were trending a little "over" budget of $450 I could bump up to $20/day for a while and still end up "under" budget of $600. So the 1st is $15, the 2nd is $30, the 3rd is $45...the 20th is $300.

Then as we go shopping, I write down "What we spent that day". I live in a small town super close to the store and we buy a lot of fresh food, so I have been going every 2-3 days. When we get home from the grocery store, I just write it on there. If we went out to eat I add that in too.

The third number "what we spent so far" is just taking the "what we spent so far" number from the day before and adding in that day's spending. Then with a quick glance at the calendar, I can see if we are under or over or on track for the month and keep that in mind on my next grocery trip!

Thankfully, I really like writing things down (and it's nice for Ralph to have access to this) but if someone wants to make an app for this, that would be super duper. And if my explanation is all complicated, the process isn't, app or no. It took me longer to write this post than it has to track our spending this way for the whole month.

I know that a natural response to this is, just break it down by the week! And I used to do a version of this on a weekly basis but it didn't work for me because 1) mentally adding up $100 of groceries as I shop is annoying 2) we were making big grocery trips once a week and then "filling in" during the week - and those trips were not cheap and 3) I HATE HATE HATE unloading groceries, so coming home with lots of bags to deal with is not good for me or anyone around me.

So this is working for me. It is really working. When I go to the store and spend $15/day I feel FANTASTIC. When I spend less than $20, I go, that's fine... STILL OKAY. I have not enjoyed grocery shopping in ages and now I do. And even when we are trending "over" for that point in the month, I know that each day brings another chunk of food allowance!

Dear Santa or Dad...

2011-12-23T15:38:00.004-05:00

Avery had a stocking with her name on it, but this year she chose to go with a slightly larger version with no name. Despite her 100% knowledge that Santa is not real, she has been a bit nervous about her stocking being unidentifiable. I had reassured her here and there, and thankfully the questions had stopped... And now I know why. The child took matters into her own hands and attached this note to the stocking.

Dear Santa or Dad,

I made this note for you beacause I want You to know that the middile

stocking is mine. You are the best. Thank you.

Love, Avery

Me and My Girl!

2011-12-17T22:19:00.001-05:00

This is Avery and I at 10:15pm Saturday night! I had just gone to Ralph's work Christmas party and was getting Avery ready for bed after a long night at the babysitters. Avery got her hair cut by someone other than me for the FIRST time earlier that day. I sent her with Ralph while these key words "tapered bob, moderate stack, longer in the front". She came home with a bob, shorter in the front and some kind of mess in the back. So sad. So later in the day, I fixed it and now it is incredible. I shortened the back length overall and then blended the mess of uneven layers in the back thanks to the atrocious job of the "professional".

I can count on 1 hand the times Ralph, and now Avery, have gotten their hair professional cut and I have not had to fix it later!!!

Avery gets a makeover!

2011-12-16T18:53:00.000-05:00

I couldn't leave Avery out of the makeover fun. Here are her favorites! I think she looks pretty amazing in all of them. It will be fun to see her grow up into a beautiful woman!

DIANNA AGRON

JULIA ROBERTS

LADY GAGA

EMMA STONE

MICHELLE WILLIAMS

Help Me! Help My Hair!

2011-12-15T20:35:00.000-05:00

Hi. This is me and my hair as of this very day. I did not have the best day, let alone hair day and I have on no make up. This picture is to show you a real "before" and that contrary to all the pictures to follow, I don't actually live in a sunny glow of yellowness. My mother will also be pretty happy with a 5 minute ago chin scar picture update. Thanks Mr. Plastic Surgeon!

So my natural curly hair has grown in about 4 inches since the straight perm (Manetamer). It all looks relatively straight today because I had it pulled back all day, but with a diffuser I can also make the entire thing massively curly again.

This is the longest I have gotten my hair in many many years. And I am wearing it pulled back 98% of the time. BORING. Plus after looking at these pictures I'm pretty sure I have a massive forehead... but the last time I tried bangs as a teen it didn't go so well. Lots to figure out.

So I know that they say if you wear your hair back all the time, you should cut it shorter. BUT. BUT. BUT. My hair either needs to be short enough to not be on my neck at all OR long enough to pull back while exercising. Oh what to do? I just spent a hilarious longer-than-I'd-like-to-admit stretch of time trying on "celebrity hairstyles" at instyle.com. I also learned how to quickly save an image as a pdf to iphoto... I love my mac. So below you will find 10 pictures (6 somewhat realistic, 1 that I actually like but don't think my hair can do and then 3 for jokes) all for your enjoyment. Please vote in the poll at right and help me decide. I have a hair appointment after Christmas. First one in... 4 months? 3 months? 6 months? NO IDEA. On some of these I did change the color to as close to my natural as I could get it. Some of them I didn't. But I am NOT planning on drastically changing my hair color.

THE MEG RYAN

THE KATE WALSH

THE GINNIFER GOODWIN (AKA MY OLD HAIR)

THE SANDRA BULLOCK

THE TAYLOR SWIFT

THE MISCHA BARTON

THE ELLEN!!!
(Anyone else seeing this with my dark hair turning me into The L Word's Katherine Moennig minus her perfect nose?)

THE SJP

SARAH PALIN... THIS ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY BUT IT JUST MAKES ME FEEL 42.

THE PD!!!
Avery said, "I think Patrick Dempsey would want to know his hair is on your head, Mommy. "

Sugar Cookie Snowmen

2011-12-15T17:55:00.000-05:00

Avery: Kitchen Dancing

2011-12-14T18:01:00.000-05:00

Hermitude.

2011-12-13T12:04:00.000-05:00

Lately, I have been going deeper and deeper into hermit mode with a side helping of attitude. Maybe it is a seasonal thing. I go to sleep thinking about my dream house - the tiny cabin with a sleeping loft in the woods with only the sound of my daughter sleeping and the nearby river. I am drawn to the simplicity. My dream life would be spent in a hammock with a book, growing our own food, leisurely preparing meals, making art with Avery. There is NO REASON why I need a house in the woods to do all of that RIGHT NOW... then I realize that I do all of that. We read. We have a garden. I cook all of our meals from scratch. Ave makes endlessly creative things. But all of these things happen with me on the hamster wheel, going going going. My dream life in the woods doesn't involve alarms and to do lists and a tight feeling in my chest. It does have me in yoga clothes radiating zen and bliss to my family.

So hermitude. I don't know if it is fatigue initiated but it is where I am at. I want to be isolated. I want to just be. I read a blog post a while back about signs that you might need to take a break. Each one absolutely described my state of being at the time. I figured I should ask Avery directly what she thought. "Ave - Do you think Mommy is too busy?" I didn't expect such a vehement "YES!!!!" It was a real wake up call. In the past couple weeks or so I have been making a real effort to tackle less in each day, one day at a time. I have been putting far fewer to do items on the kitchen chalkboard. I have reminded myself every day that a Yes to someone else is a No to Avery, Ralph or myself.

So as everyone else is cramming their calendars full of holiday this and holiday that (other than work/gym/ski trails), you will most likely find me hanging out with Avery... cooking, reading, creating, breathing... appreciating the season of hermitude.

2011-12-12T18:30:00.001-05:00

You know your child is sick when this is what they do while you wash the dishes.

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Facebook. It's not you, it's me (it's really you though).

2011-12-11T20:05:00.001-05:00

If Facebook was my boyfriend, our relationship would be in jeopardy. In today's blogisode, I am going to vent about facebook. Social media can be lovely. I think twitter is great. I love reading blogs. But facebook makes me want to hit it over the head with a frying pan.

If you don't have facebook or if you love facebook, this post is probably not for you. Actually this post is not for any one specifically other than myself. It's just my attempt to sort out my need/hate relationship with facebook. And I either write about this or how the toenail I lost is growing back in (very nicely actually). Plus all attempts to discuss my facebook frustrations with Ralph have ended with him giving me the “what’s wrong with you?” face. Lest the face be lost in translation, he then adds “No one else thinks about these things”. I highly doubt that… but I do acknowledge that the strength with which it bothers me may be "excessive"...

1) You can check in any time you like, but you can never leave... No matter how grumpy it makes me, it is now a central way that almost all of the adults I know communicate, host events or get community information. When my grumpiness gets to the level of “I’ll just deactive my account!” I know that I would miss out on group fitness meet-ups, event updates, race information, party invites, etc… This would not be the end of the world, but I do like knowing about these things and so far that has overridden my desire to leave entirely. So I always go back to the just-check-it-less approach. Helpful in reducing grumpiness but not eliminating it.

2) Just say no doesn’t work here. I don’t do a lot of “friending”. When I first joined a year or 2 ago, I did friend people I actually know and socialize with in real life, family, etc. Probably 100 people. Now I have recently passed the 300 friend mark (not even a high number in facebook land for you uninitiated). If someone "friends" you, and you know them in any way, it would be quite rude to not accept. I don’t mind being friends with acquaintances but that is a lot of status updates – ranging from the ones I want to see… to the ones I don’t.

3) You can run, but you can’t hide. So to deal with too many updates, I initially just hid a lot of people, meaning I am still their fb friend and can look at their page but I don’t see their updates in my home feed (list of status updates). This way I can actually read the updates of people I am close to. I found out the hard way that at least for local acquaintances/friends, this doesn’t always work out well.

Worst case scenario: Grocery store. See acquaintance while looking at facebook on your phone. Say “Hi, how are you? Did you see that ridiculous video on facebook today posted by _insert mutual friend’s name_ of her dog bouncing on their trampoline? Videos about pets are almost as dumb as having one in the first place.” Friend for not much longer: “Did you see my post right before that about our new puppy dying this morning?” Awkward. “Umm… no I didn’t see that” is true… but it wouldn’t take a genius to at least wonder if they have been hidden. It’s kind of like putting your fingers in your ears when someone is talking to you and cant’ see you… but then all the sudden they turn around.

So after my own less dramatic version of the completely made up grocery store aisle encounter, I unhid all local people and started a chapter of Friends Don’t Let Friends Hide Each Other.

4) You’re so vain, you probably think this post is about you, don’t you? Everyone can use facebook how they want, it’s a free country. I KNOW. But it continually amazes me what people will post. Here are some examples of posts that make me seriously reconsider my no hiding approach.

Super Boring Posts: Ugh. I wish I could just stay in bed.

Just ate breakfast.

At work...

WE KNOW!!! WE ALL JUST DID THE SAME THING. Go use twitter. It is for (hopefully more interesting versions of) these same posts. Seriously.

Attention Seeker Teasers: …sigh

I guess it was too good to be true.

Why do things just never work out for me?

OH MY GOODNESS. Out with it!

5) Can't see the forest for the trees: Most of the people I know post mainly good things - happy things, kid stuff, so grateful for their wonderful life, vacation pictures, etc. People don't tend to post that they are washing dishes, filling the car up with gas or taking a shower. (THANK GOODNESS.) BUT that is what most of us are doing... boring, repetitive stuff, but then we check facebook and see 10 posts about cool stuff. I think it skews our perspective that other people's lives are more interesting. I try to remember that my other 290 friends also just vacuumed the living room.

6) Brag much? It always makes me feel like someone's "friend" when they post a picture of a party at their house... that I wasn't invited to. Personally, I don't post pictures of dinners or parties or get togethers at my house on facebook anymore because if I did I might as well caption it "Here is a picture of me having fun at something that I didn’t invite you to!"

7) Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous: I think it is important to stop and ask why are we doing this in the first place? Does all the posting and tagging actually build community? Is it our attempt to be the stars of our own reality shows? Is it turning adults back into teenagers with ever increasing needs for affirmation and external validation!???! (In case it's not clear, I'm voting yes.)

I do recognize the potential irony of talking about this WHILE I’M BLOGGING, but I see a blog as quite different from the massive collection of nonsense and fluffery that is 99% of facebook content. A blog is a journal of my life, my family's life. It may very well be nonsense and fluff but you chose to read a blog, go to the site, sign up as a follower, ask to get it by email, put me in your google reader, etc. If you are on facebook, you don’t choose to get tagged, have someone write on your wall, or see the umpteenth post about someone’s kids... or love of muffins. And twitter (used on your phone) is an immediate connection to the current happenings in the lives of friends/followers. I do care that my sister is driving home from a trip THIS VERY MINUTE and I can text her and say "Drive safe. (You haven't mailed my Christmas present yet.)"

I don't <3 you facebook, but I can't quit you just yet. Maybe we can have a long distance relationship...

Molasses Cookies... I hope.

2011-12-03T14:35:00.001-05:00

Ave has a friend over and we are making molasses cookies. In an attempt to give them something to do while I got the ingredients out and more importantly, to be able to put my laptop far far away while actually cooking with children - I read the recipe from the internet and had them write it on the kitchen chalkboard.

In case you can't read it, some of my favorites are:

350 four 9 minutes.

For some reason, they added numbers in front of only some of them like a bulleted list. Thankfully my memory is good enough to know it wasn't 21 cup brown sugar or 4 1/2 cup molasses.

Ave wasn't quite sure how to write the fractions, so I tried saying 2.5 instead of 2 1/2... and she literally wrote 2 point 5 flour. Priceless.

Gingerbread House Decorating Night

2011-12-02T18:52:00.001-05:00

It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas!

RIP: Stella Pothoven

2011-11-26T17:58:00.001-05:00

My grandmother died Tuesday morning. Her funeral was today. I wasn't able to be there but the below was read by my dad today. I could go on and on about favorite memories of Grandma and the farm in Iowa. The pictures with Grandma and Grandpa and Avery are from NC on two different visits. The one of Avery in the hat is from the summer she was 2. My mom, dad, Avery and I went by car for a week at the farm. I loved being there as a kid and I really loved being there with my own child!

Thanks to my mother's fear of flying and gas station bathrooms, I remember many no-drinks-allowed car trips to visit Grandma and Grandpa at the farm. We would tumble out of the car, desperate for drinks and a chance to stretch our legs. The first deep breath was always intense... we were at the farm. Thankfully the fresh farm smell was quickly ignored as we took in the rest of what the farm and Grandma's hospitality had to offer. She greeted us with a hug so strong it made up for a year (or more) gone. Our trips were full of tradition and they are some of my best childhood memories.

Climbing apple trees and making applesauce

The twinkle in Grandma's eyes while beating us at the game spoon

Sitting on the metal lawn furniture as the sun set

Watering geraniums together

Watching her make those rolls with no recipe for us to copy. My best efforts to eyeball it resulted in about 15 cups of flour.

Getting everything ready for the picnic/bonfire in the wood and riding in the back of the truck, Grandma proper as can be with her hair tied back

When she would play the piano

I loved our time at the farm, full of Grandma's food and love.

Life in Maine

2011-11-19T22:29:00.001-05:00

I figured some of my away family might gain some insight from this facebook status update of a friend...

"Forget Rednecks ... here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about MAINERS. If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you live in Maine. If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Maine. If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Maine. If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed ...a wrong number, you live in Maine. If you measure distance in hours, you live in Maine If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Maine. If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again, you live in Maine. IF YOU CAN DRIVE 75 MPH THROUGH 2 FEET OF SNOW DURING A BLIZZARD WITHOUT FLINCHING,YOU LIVE IN MAINE. you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you live in Maine. If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you live in Maine. If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Maine. If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Maine. If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you live in Maine. If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you live in Maine. If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly", you live in Maine. If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Maine friends & others, you live in Maine!!!!"

This is pretty true. It is "almost winter" here... and today I did try to encourage a friend today that at least the potholes in her driveway will be better in a few months when filled with snow... and today I did wear a winter jacket and flip flops at the same time... and Avery did wear her Halloween costume over a winter coat. I guess we are Mainers!

Creativity Exercised

2011-11-12T19:25:00.001-05:00

The combination of my accident and the change in seasons resulted in a silver lining of some extra time. I have more than filled it by finally giving into my passion for photography.

In addition to practicing with my own camera and joining the local photography club, I am reading photography blogs and articles. It is very clear to me that there are amazingly talented people in the world and whatever I do, it has probably already been done before and better. I spent some time thinking why bother? Why am I doing this when at best I might be good? Hmm... It seemed rather pointless and embarrassing for a few days...

Self Portrait - Metamorphosis

Last weekend, I was on a walk with two women. One of them is an athlete and an artist. Thinking she might have wrestled with my question, I broached the topic. Why do it when you are never going to be the "best"... As I asked her my question about art, I realized it applied just as well to athletes who will never get to the Olympics.

Making the connection between art and sport in my question was really the answer I needed. When it comes to fitness, we all benefit by exercising, no matter our level of performance. I put time and money towards biking, running and skiing (and I can't even win a local race). Not for one second have I ever felt bad about any energy spent enjoying fitness - no matter my "finish place". Just as our body visibly deteriorates from the lack of exercise, so too our best self is limited if creativity is not explored.

I am reminded of something shared by another friend:

Don't ask yourself what the world needs

Ask yourself what makes you come alive

Then go and do that

Because what the world needs is people who have become alive

Leaf Jumping

2011-11-02T14:00:00.001-04:00

Avery had a great time playing in the leaves while I raked!

Tooth Fairy Time

2011-11-01T21:02:00.001-04:00

It's finally gone!

Easy on the Eyes: October 2011

2011-10-23T14:01:00.000-04:00

She gets more beautiful every day.

I'm A Giant! (0 Dollars)

2011-10-22T21:07:00.000-04:00

We love Emily Henderson and she is doing an I'm A Giant: Dollhouse Challenge. Avery thought it was a great idea. Given that we are in a no spending phase, I had to give up visions of creating my dream mini-house and see what we could make with an afternoon and no money.

I used a couple cardboard boxes to build an open concept living area with the kitchen in the back left (missing countertops), bathroom in the back right corner and living room in the front. The stairs lead to the sleeping loft.

Avery then went to town decorating the walls, loading in her small furniture set, and adding all kinds of cuteness. She set the table with coins. She used a toothpick and cork to make a chandelier. She made a tiny book to display on the coffee table. The doll she made at the fairy afternoon is busy doing her homework. It was really fun to see her have fun with it.

There are some incredible dollhouses being made out there... and I would love to pour all my endless hours of free time into it (HA.) but this was just as fun in an eco-friendly mom/daughter project way.

What I'm Not Buying

2011-10-18T20:04:00.003-04:00

It's really good that a friend sent me these books to read...

Because I want to break the pact on this:

Danskin Dance Wrap Top

And at a much higher price point, I REALLY want to break the pact on this:

Marmot Women's Variant Jacket

(I love the blue one with yellow. The sleeves have thumbholes. I want something with thumbholes!!! I think it would be a perfect weight for snowshoeing or a warmer ski top when skiing slowly with Avery.)

I am going with Avery's class on their field trip to a landfill on Thursday. Good timing...

PS. But the bike store was able to fix my front tire... so I don't have to buy a new wheel.

PPS. This is harder than I thought it would be!!!

Dempsey Challenge: My new best friend. PD.

2011-10-14T19:43:00.000-04:00

Sorry it took me 5 days to get these pictures up on the blog. You all know that I left some of my face and all of my pride at mile 60 when I fell off the side of the road. Injuries seem to be healing up... final verdict on knee still up in the air but I am optimistic. I was able to go without crutches for most of today. Anyway... I have had a thing for Patrick Dempsey since Can't Buy Me Love. Actually in the first picture, I said "Oh, Ronald Miller..." right before it was taken. He said, "Oh, I love that! Awesome! You are now my number one fan and I am going to text you every day for the rest of my life and let you stay in my guest house!" One of those sentences is true. So first pic is in the hotel before the run on Saturday. He was in a hurry to get to the event but we got a few photos, a quick chat and I got to put my around his waist. I only removed it because the security guard had a good 100 pounds on me.

Brace yourself for this shocking piece of news. He is MORE attractive/charming/sexy than I have EVER seen him on TV. EVER. Seriously. I was kind of taken aback. And according to my friends when I turned around and saw him, my face looked a way that they have never seen before. It's called bliss, people. Also remember that I was about to go run. Next year I'm at least wearing concealer.

Prior to the run, Dempsey was talking to the crowd (LOTS of runners) and he says "We've got runners here from Caribou". Yeah, he mentioned us. It was fantastic moment #2.

THEN after the run, we were walking back to the hotel and he was being driven in his car. I spotted him with my finely tuned DempseyDar AND THEN HIS CAR SLOWED DOWN. Be still my beating heart. He had the window down and leaned his entire body out and said "How was your run guys???". Fantastic moment #3.

And then this amazing thing happened. Fantastic moment #4. We came upon him on the ride. I am a SOLID introvert - except when handsome, famous or European men are involved. So I just moved right up next to him and he said "Oh hey guys! There you are! I was wondering when in the world I would get to ride with the most beautiful funniest woman I have ever met other than my wife. My day is now complete." Two of those sentences are true. So I got to ride and chat with him for a bit. We talked about cycling and where he likes to ride (Maine - West Coast roads are apparently bad - so take that California) and then he tried to talk me into doing Levi Leipheimer's Gran Fondo. We also met Levi on Friday night in the hotel. He is super short but in that picture I have make up on. So it will probably be in the next post.

I am looking at my friend risking his life to get 500 pictures of me riding with Dempsey. The only reason Dempsey isn't looking is because he didn't want to fall off the side of the road like an idiot.

And guess what!!! I just signed up to do it again next year. Despite my crash, I had a GREAT time. It supports a fantastic Breast Cancer center in Maine. I'm in! AND if I raise over $10,000, I get a private ride with Dempsey and the pro cyclists (more on them later). So in lieu of Christmas presents... start donating. LOL. Seriously though ---> Link to my fundraising page.

Dempsey Challenge: Oops, I did it again!

2011-10-10T15:50:00.003-04:00

I was excited about sharing the fun of the Dempsey Challenge weekend with everyone... star sightings, etc. But then I crashed my bike. So here is the injury report and I'll get to the fun stuff later... you know when I can walk and stuff.

Bruise bump thing on right knee. There is a bigger one on my upper thigh from my bike frame..

I slid on the pavement for a bit. I've got 4 road rash wounds. Thankfully nothing huge. Too bad this busted open though.

I asked the ER doctor for a plastic surgeon consult. He did a great job sewing it up. Having 5 shots of lidocaine in my face (which then ran down my neck - he said "Yeah, your face is leaking" haha). I was kind of sad when the lidocaine wore off. My jaw is sore and bruised and swollen. Fingers crossed for a good result cause IT'S ON MY FACE, Y'ALL.

This is my left knee as of this morning. The scrapes just sting. The swelling is substantial enough that I can't bend my knee nor put much weight on it right now. Hopefully the swelling is the only reason I can't bend it... the xrays didn't show any fractures and they can't assess soft tissue damage until swelling goes down. I am dependent on crutches at the moment which I am pretty good at...

So how did I fall off my bike? Well, we had been riding 60 miles and I was tired and I took a left turn and got distracted midway and when I looked straight again I was almost on the edge of the road. Thanks to a recent pave job, there was at least a 6 inch drop off. I tried to pull it back but wasn't able too. My bike slipped off the side, front tire flatted, front rim destroyed (I think) and I went down. There was some pavement sliding. And then there was a lot of blood from my face. Everyone was really helpful. I did not hit my head, I did not break anything (other than my bike). I went to the ER because I needed to have my chin sutured at a minimum. I did request a plastic surgeon and one was actually in the hospital on a Sunday and came to see me within an hour. He was very optimistic that my face will heal up okay especially if I do everything he said I should (no sun, neosporin, massage at 3 weeks, etc.) which I will.
As for my knee, it is still too early to tell. Hope to have good news on that within a few days...
The fact that all of this happened on October 9th was just icing on the cake. I'm pretty proud of myself that I only had 1 crying, shaking episode on the 6 hr trip back home when my attempt at eating real food backfired. I am very thankful for all the kind strangers and even better friends that helped me through yesterday. Never so happy to get into my own bed at 1 am. Ralph took today off from work since Ave is out of school. So one day at a time... which is how it always should be.
As Ave was heading out with Ralph to go bowling, Ave looks at me in all seriousness and even a little dreamy eyed and says "Mommy, is this just your best day ever?" I said, "Um, no not quite! Why?" and she says "Because you've just laid on the couch and watched TV all day!!!"

Avery's Harvest Hoedown

2011-10-04T21:17:00.002-04:00

Ralph and I were both able to go to the Hoedown at Avery's school. We were lucky to have a sunny, not too cold day. Avery had a great time running around to all the stations with one of her pals.

Digging for wooden nickels.

I have at least 5 photos of her looking absolutely miserable getting her face painted. When done, "I love it!!!" Okay...

Similar dynamic on the pony ride. She looked alternately terrified and bored but said it was great. This girl should play poker.

Photography Walk: A Farm

2011-10-04T20:55:00.000-04:00

I've attended a couple of digital photography classes lately. I am learning a lot and have enjoyed practicing. The following pictures are from a local farm where I wandered around for a while and then ate enough ice-cream to not need dinner later. I should have taken a picture of that beautiful bowl before I ate it all!

MBK: 3 Years

2011-09-24T07:19:00.000-04:00

I have scheduled this blog post with Matthew's birthdate of Saturday but am not actually writing it until Monday evening. I didn't forget... I just didn't know what I wanted to say. I spent most of the day volunteering at the Aroostook Dirty 30 race and then recuperating from said event. On the way home, I kept bursting into tears thinking about Matthew and the events of 9/24/08.

In the past, words of grief have come pretty easily. And two days later, I still don't know what I want to say. This year I am just... tired. I am tired of having two dead babies on top of all the other struggles. So yeah, just tired of it all still being true.

So I don't use this blog to vent about too much negative stuff and I don't want to start now... but lately I have been just going and going and going. It is all good stuff plus the never ever ending routine of groceries, cooking, cleaning. Fitness, mom duties, photography hobby, sewing project, bathroom project, volunteer commitments, a little thread of a social life AND OH YEAH THAT THING CALLED A JOB. But it doesn't feel good. It is really stressful. I don't know why I can't sit still. LIE. I totally know. The last thing I want to be is alone with my own thoughts because that is when the sadness/frustration/whatever will take hold. But I can't keep going like this.

So I'm going to take some deep breaths and try to create some room for... quality downtime. If I have to add "just be" to the to do list, I will. I promised Avery I will finish up my projects and not start any new ones. The only way I know how to honor Matthew's life is to make the most of Avery's and she needs a mom who is not a stressed out whirlwind.

(Mom note: I'm fine, Mom. Really.)

Upcycled Girls' Dress from Skirt and T-Shirt

2011-09-17T08:00:00.000-04:00

Avery loves being the model as much as having a new dress!

I made this dress out of a skirt that someone gave me 4 years ago. I pulled the waist up to Ave's armpits, then added straps made from Ralph's old undershirts. The wonky stitching was purposeful. The black tie on the right strap is the drawstring of a very very old pair of shorts that are now for painting only. I made no alterations to the skirt at all, so if we wanted to turn it back into a skirt later we can.

Anyone thinking River Dance scholarship???

These

are some of my favorite shots from our modeling session. I had a blast experimenting with my camera and have since le

arned some tricks that would have made for better results. Always more to learn!

Ave said she is "workin' it"

No More Stuff

2011-09-16T07:30:00.000-04:00

I love my house.

But I have a tiny, flicker of a secret dream. I want to live in a tiny house. Truly tiny. Something like Bungalow in a Box or a Tumbleweed Home (and I knew about them BEFORE they were on HGTV, so yes I'm that cool). Only space for what you need. 2 towels. 4 plates. Just a few clothes. A sleeping loft with a mattress and a candle. One couch. No TV. A view of a river and a huge tree swing. A place for everything and everything in its place. And by everything, I mean not very much. Thank goodness people seem to be moving away from more is better. More is not better. More is a slap in the face to the strained resources of our planet AND our wallets.

The "Story of Stuff" video below made an impression on me whenever it first came out. Watching it a couple weeks ago with Avery fanned the flames of this tiny dream of mine. Her sensitive little soul actually cried real tears at how terrible our consumer based society is for the environment and the workers that make all that "cheap" disposable stuff. I kept telling her we could stop the video but she said No, she wanted to know. And hopefully if you didn't know, now you will too. This is the full version but there are shorter versions on youtube as well.

So I told Ralph about my tiny little tiny house dream. Picture him clapping his hands in pure joy and jumping up and down going "Oh yes!!! Oh Yes! OH YES!!! Let's make this happen NOW!!!" and then imagine the exact opposite of this and that is what happened.

OK fine. Maybe I was rushing into an extreme lifestyle change a bit too fast. So, our lovely beautiful 4 bedroom big kitchen house does not have a for sale sign up in front. It does however have 3 people living inside who have made an agreement to live in our not small house as if it is the tiniest on the block. Just because we have room in a closet for something doesn't mean we hold on to it. The thrift store pile in the sunroom is growing by the day. Just because a fantastic piece of furniture went on clearance and would be just perfect in my house does not mean we will buy it. We have made an agreement to only buy things that are essentials. Food. Toilet paper. And anything to replace something that has broken and was truly needed in the first place. And if it is possible to buy something used or freecycle it we will go that route first. To borrow the header phrase from the Non-Consumer Advocate "Use it up. Wear it out. Make it do. Or do without."

Special notice for family aka The Christmas Buzzkill: I wanted to get this post up now because some of you are super early bird Christmas shoppers. Please help us in our goal of No More Stuff by not giving us any Stuff. This is not easy for me to say because some of that Stuff is pretty awesome... but we have far more than we need already and want is not enough to justify needless consumerism. Ralph and I will happily enter into a mutual no gift policy with any of you as we already have with many of you.

Now as for the Avery issue... I know that for some of you, shopping for her is really fun for you. I know if I couldn't hug and kiss her every day, I would buy her something too. But try to picture her sitting in front of that video with tears streaming down her face. She is taking this really seriously. She gets it. She can tell you about the production cycle and that it all just goes in the trash and that companies design their products to be thrown away so you will buy them again.

The motivation behind No More Stuff is so as a family we can put our time and energy towards activities and not thinking about, shopping for or cleaning up after all our stuff. So my first suggestion would be gifts of money towards lessons of some kind. I can pool it together and let her pick what she wants to do. She is thinking of doing dance again. There are horse back riding lessons up here. I just signed her up for children's yoga and am quite positive that will be successful. She will need another ski rental package. We have a local art center that she would like to go to more often.

And as she spends most of her time doing craft things, some real art supplies - nice paper, oil pastels, paint, modeling clay etc. would also be wonderful. (We already have everything Crayola makes.) I know these supplies are technically things but the paper can be post-consumer recycled and it is art, so the earth can deal with it.

Other than those 2 categories, please run it by us first so your gift does not come in conflict with our family policy.

River Rock Pendant

2011-09-11T17:56:00.001-04:00

I like making my own jewelry, so now I have yet another hobby! Actually posting this while I am sewing a throw pillow for a friend and just rsvp'd yes to a photography education series of classes. I need to be stopped!

Rainy Bike Race

2011-09-09T21:04:00.000-04:00

Click on the link below for a picture of me and the crazy lady who talked me into a hilly 40 miles of constant rain. I had decided earlier in the day to not enter... but then 20 minutes to race time she called and said DO IT WITH ME! So I said OKAY!!! I had a great time. No one got hurt. And only partially thanks to the lack of a meal prior to the race, I ate a york peppermint patty, reese's peanut butter cup, twix and 4 pieces of pizza afterwards. Yes!!!

Adventures of an American Biathlete: a little scenery from the last few weeks...: The past few weeks I have enjoyed getting back into training here in Northern Maine. Here are few photos to sum up what I have been ...

First Day of School

2011-09-04T19:23:00.003-04:00

One of many last hugs before getting on the bus!

Pretty in purple.

Thanks to Labor Day weekend and no out-of-the-house plans today, I got a bunch of pictures transferred to the computer. Here is Avery on her first day of school. She had a GREAT first week of school. Her favorites times are "read aloud" and "work time". They have two pets, a turtle (Snapper) and a gecko (Lizzie). Avery is on the Green Team and has responsibilities in the lunch room to make sure things aren't being thrown away that should be washed or recycled. All reports have been very positive. We have high hopes for this year!

Fredericton Trip: The Blue Door

2011-09-03T12:54:00.001-04:00

Our pre back to school overnight in Fredericton continued with a $$$ dinner at The Blue Door. I had been there on my previous visit and wanted Ralph and Avery to try it.

My vegetarian something (pad thai, I think)... I wish they still had the Veg Yellow Curry option!

Ralph's spicy noodle option. SO SO SO GOOD. SO SO SO SPICY.

Chickens don't have fingers, Silly!

Brownie done right.

TreeGo Adventure

2011-09-01T12:04:00.000-04:00

We took an overnight trip to Fredericton, NB. On the way, we stopped at a tree adventure place (ropes, wires, zip line, harness) for Avery to do the children's course. It was about 12-15 feet off the ground. Avery had to do all the clipping in and out and transitions on platforms by herself. She did a great job following all the safety rules and did a lot better on the course than I expected. There were a few tears but overall she was really brave. Not sure we will be able to get her to go back anytime soon but Ralph and I would love to do the adult course!

Pre Tree

One of the only smiles!

"Why does it keep wobbling, Mommmmyyyyy????"

Butterfly Beauty

2011-08-31T20:58:00.004-04:00

Post birthday party at the local Art Center. Happy Girl!

Airport bound

2011-08-31T03:52:00.001-04:00

Even though I am going fishing, 3:30am is still just early!

ON THE ROAD!

2011-08-30T12:34:00.001-04:00

Leaving for Boston today and will fly out tomorrow morning for British Columbia!

Carrot Top

2011-08-28T09:54:00.002-04:00

Avery and Bunny on a quick trip to Fredericton, Canada before school starts.
(Taken and posted with Ralph's camera. Sorry it is sideways!)

My Drop in the Bucket

2011-08-27T20:03:00.002-04:00

Today the sun is warming my body and making me happy in my soul. After a productive morning and an afternoon celebrating another year of life for a beautiful friend, Avery and I return home. She wants to go to the park. Ave bikes next to me while I take my injured shins on their first jog in 2 weeks. Pride in her accomplishments, general bravery and inquisitive mind make the pounding a pleasure. It is good to be alive and moving forward. We arrive and start our playground workout - lunges, squats and pull-ups disguised as tag and follow the leader.

The swings are unfortunately off-limits due to the teenagers and the cloud of discontent and foul language that surrounds them. Avery is aware of the words sh!t and b!tch and apparently even the f-word thanks to a particularly intense basketball game. However, the word faggot is a new one and even gets my attention. I try to tune them out and focus on the joy of movement and childhood. But they aren't stopping. The repetition of "Don't be gay" as a general insult is as shocking as it is offensive. I know I can stop it by walking up to them and using my mom voice. Last week when I saw a few kids disrespecting the tennis courts, I had no problem scaring the ever-loving shit out of them with a speech about public property, taxes and what their parents would think if they knew what they were doing. (Those kids did say they were sorry, so maybe they weren't full punk yet.)

A few opening lines run through my head, but I don't approach. A simple "Hey, there are children here" would silence them. Saying "Statistically one of you is gay, but apparently all of you are bigots" would be satisfying. But I don't want to silence them or make myself feel better. I want them to understand the breadth and joy of human experience. I want them to take up their own space without demeaning someone else's. I want their parents' to refrain from passing on their own prejudices to a developing mind. I want the collective community to protect and defend the rights of all to live free of judgement and derision. I decide there is no one speech up to that challenge.

We leave the playground. As I jog home, the faces of lesbians that I know and love and respect play like a slideshow in my mind. I ask them "Do you want me to go back and give a speech? What should I do?" My older sister says "The sun is still shining. It is still good to be alive and moving forward." And it is. At home, I turn on some indie rock music and pour myself some cheap wine. Avery and I talk about words and choices and equality. She is my drop in the bucket.

Taking a Timeout

2011-08-21T18:25:00.000-04:00

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am going to go on a blog hiatus. I know my posting frequency over the summer has gone way down when I should have had more time, not less! My broken phone hasn't helped as sending posts from it is now an obnoxious hassle. Even with posting less often lately, I still feel the stress of wanting to get a post up and then the frustration with myself for not. I know that there are several family members who really appreciate the blog but I also know they wouldn't want me to do it at the expense of anything else - like my happiness. Is the blog making me unhappy? Goodness, no! However, I am struggling with a full plate both internally and externally and something has to give. I can't take a hiatus from many of these challenges, so I am taking it where I can. Wish me luck with the "full plate" and hopefully the joyful girl will be back to regular programming sooner rather than later.

(If you are getting this through email, then it doesn't really affect you - more of a heads up that you might not get anything for a while.)

Dance Show: Post-show snack!

2011-08-20T12:51:00.000-04:00

We went to the one of the local burger places and OD'd on ice-cream to celebrate! I had to make the pictures black and white because this particular establishment is so red - walls, table, lights - that the pictures glowed!

Dance Show: The Conga Video!

2011-08-19T12:47:00.006-04:00

Avery starts in the back row and then moves up to the front row after the line. She has a red lei on one arm and a blue on the other. I love this video. She is working so hard to follow the teacher who is at the front of the stage on the side (not in the video). So adorable!

Dance Show: The Pre-Show Pics!

2011-08-18T20:15:00.000-04:00

Sorry it took so long for me to get these up. I sort of forgot about it. Whoops! Enjoy these of Ave having fun with her friends. Her hair sprayed bun was so fabulous! The last pic is post show, so it had loosened up a bit but you still get the idea!

Tomorrow I will post a video of her class dance.

10 days?!? (And why I just bought a massage table.)

2011-08-16T00:22:00.000-04:00

So wow. I went 10 days without a post and not many tweets. Nothing is wrong - other than I am awake in the middle of the night. If I don't go to sleep at the same time as Avery, this seems to happen. Tonight's distraction was a quite enjoyable episode of Drop Dead Diva from the dvr (#dontjudge) and online shopping for a massage table. What? A massage table. I know. Radical. And no, I am not embarking on a third career. Still going the bank route for now. I do love rockin' the snooty dress code and how clean my office is*. (Though if anyone wants to start a small events catering business with me, I could be persuaded in 15 seconds.) *OK, so it isn't as tidy as it was. Due to Ralph's work schedule last week and lack of childcare, I brought Avery to work with me for 13 hours. I now know that it takes her 13 hours to read 4 library books, make 7 paper dolls, 4 compasses (that REALLY work, Mom!!!), do 1,742 spins in an office chair and turn a 9 month pile of scrap paper into snowflakes that are now all taped to my wall. Thankfully it wasn't until Friday that she said "Um, Mom... you have a really really boring job." She's right. I do. But it allows me to do things like buy a massage table when I am not a massage therapist. Now why I bought it is another story. I have recently dived headfirst into making some parenting adjustments to help my intense, sensitive little one weather the storms of life a bit more gracefully. Part of the program is helping her relax. So I have been watching youtube videos and paid for a lesson from a massage therapist friend to help me with my moves. Avery requested 3 massages today! Since we started this, she has been overflowing with expressions of love towards me, her outbursts have reduced by at least 75% and I have found living with her to be almost entirely enjoyable. We were able to borrow a massage table for 3 days and it made all the difference in giving a proper massage. So I priced out building my own table (idea rejected), consulted with another massage therapist friend, online shopped and comparison priced and read all the reviews until I actually got a little teary about my inability to make a decision. I called Ralph at work, got the go ahead, and in a few days will be the proud owner of a table, fleece pad and sheet set at what I do say is the best possible price that could have been found for what I hope is more than good enough quality for home use!

Dress Rehearsal... Back Stage Waiting

2011-08-06T08:31:00.001-04:00

Make-up Lessons (Needed)

2011-08-02T22:56:00.000-04:00

Check me out...

I live in Crazy Town!

Mommy, help me!

Avery has her dance show on Sunday night. At her last class on Monday, the teacher mentioned that on Saturday's dress rehearsal it might be good to come in show make-up and hair to make sure it looked right for the performance. Hold the phone... what you say? Putting make up on her had not occurred to me and we all know I never do Avery's hair. Around year 4 of her hair brushing tantrums, I gave up. The child can look a mess if it keeps the peace. Anyway... hair and make-up on Saturday... as practice for Sunday. I must be prophetic, because somehow I just knew we needed to practice for the practice. Now this is not our best work but I really hate to admit how hard I was trying on the face. I think I made my point with Avery that I can't do the "ballerina bun" she has requested without using a hairbrush. That will be tomorrow's practice session... Wish me luck (and ear plugs)!

Music in the Park

2011-07-24T17:43:00.001-04:00

Ave joining in the drum circle.

2011-07-22T19:58:00.000-04:00

So we walked to dinner. Power lost in whole town due to extreme rainstorm. A cook who just got his DL 2 days ago drove Ave and I home in his new mustang... and we see this half sheared off tree that just missed the garage and a pine tree that is being held up temporarily by friends. At least the sunporch roof didn't leak during this freak storm.

Lawn! Leeches! Lucky!

2011-07-15T07:17:00.000-04:00

So we had another great summer day yesterday. After a couple hours of me at work and Ave at VBS, we were outside for most of the rest of the day. Ave was playing outside with neighbor kids, library time, friend over and a kayaking lesson. The weather was absolutely perfect. Some extra duties are on my plate these days, which means...
I got to mow the lawn myself for the first time! That riding lawn mower is a beast, but I tamed her. It was actually rather fun. You would imagine with my Type A personality that I would have perfect straight lines and get every blade. HA. Times they are a-changin'! I chose the wild circles and figure-8's approach. What I didn't get this time, I'll get the next. The mower is pretty bouncy... I think I might need to gain 50 lbs before I try it again. There were a few times I had to hold onto the seat with my free hand to not get tossed off.
So after all that fun, I loaded up a borrowed trailer, my kayak and a borrowed tandem and took Avery to a kayaking lesson with local adults. Tandem for me and Ave. Single for a kayak-less friend. It was great. Learned a lot. Removed my first two leeches. Cool in its own gross way. Didn't leave until about 8:15. Called Ralph. While we were talking I hit a huge bump and then saw the trailer in the rear-view mirror. VERY BAD. I got out of the truck and was horrified to see that the trailer had come off the ball hitch and wedged itself in between the bumper and the truck bed door. It took me about a minute to even pull it out. Amazingly the door isn't really damaged. (Ralph if you are reading this, not damaged at all! Not even a little bit!) The bumper rubber is but not all the way through and nothing that needs to be fixed or even talked about again. So I was so happy about this but then I had to get it back on the truck. This took me about 20 minutes at home in the garage, so I was glad it only took about 5 on the side of the road and my entire body weight jumping up and down on it. Again, maybe an extra 50 would have come in handy today. (The trailer is really old and there are some issues. I KNOW HOW TO DO IT. It wasn't me...) So I get back in the truck, call Ralph back. Tell him Yay! We are ok! Your truck is OK! I'm heading home now! and he reminds me that the trailer doesn't have lights and why am I out so late? SHOOT. I forgot about that. So in addition to being at 95% stress level that the trailer is going to come off again, I was now worried about not only the danger of driving in the deep dusk (aka pretty much dark now) with no brake lights on the trailer but a policeman feeling the need to make a point with a ticket. So I drove slow-ish but fast enough to get home before it was completely dark. I can't back the truck up with the trailer on it (my inadequacies this time) so I had to pull it uphill on the driveway and into the garage by hand. It was a bit heavy but I made it. So happy to make it all in one piece!

Strawberry Picking

2011-07-13T20:32:00.000-04:00

After a short morning at work, Avery and I went for a bike/run and ended up at the pool. Our local outdoor pool, has a crack and is constantly being refilled with fresh (COLD) water. And today's high was around 66. It was one of those you know you're in N. Maine when the lifeguards have on sweatshirts moments. Ave did turn a little blue and I made her lay on the concrete for a while until her skin wasn't cool to the touch... and then she ran right back in. She is the new polar bear champ!

After a quick snack of sugar snap peas from the garden, we went strawberry picking. For those that haven't seen Ave in real life for a while, she really is as tall as she looks in the strawberry field picture. She just keeps stretching out.

Ave had a fun time riding the merry-go-round to Abba's greatest hits CD. I had a stare-down with this black horse that was giving me weird vibes.

After all of our hard work, we enjoyed the best ice-cream in the county. Ave went with the long-standing favorite of coffee oreo and I got all goofy happy on a scoop of mojito ice-cream. Yep. I'm making that at home the next chance I get.

The kids had a fun time feeding sheep and chickens in the animal barn aka hay allergy torture zone. I stayed outside most of the time as the sneezing frequency was just plain rude... and got a close-up picture of really cool moss? mold? Don't know, but I likey.

This is the first week that I have felt it really was summer. Sun. Flip-flops. Free time. Fresh vegetables.

I'm happy!

Kayaking with my parents

2011-07-11T12:47:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Ralph for his transport help. Here we are at our drop off point. It temporarily stopped raining... so we went for it. During our almost 3 hour time on the river, we got drizzled on, dumped on and then so sunny all the jackets came off. We saw bald eagles and a hawk. It was wonderful!

Avery and Grandpa - They made a great team. Once Ave got used to one paddle, we connected the other half and they even paddled along in perfect unison for a while.

The Dempsey Challenge: Show me MORE money!

2011-07-09T14:46:00.000-04:00

OK, so I didn't realize the very last post I had done on the blog was about my Ride Aroostook fundraising... and here I go again. My fundraising goals for Ride Aroostook were met in the first 24 hours so if you didn't donate for that and wanted to, please choose this new event instead!

I have signed up for The Dempsey Challenge. It is October 8th and 9th in Southern Maine started by McDreamy himself. The Dempsey Challenge is a fundraising experience for The Patrick Dempsey Center for Cancer Hope & Healing at Central Maine Medical Center in Lewiston, Maine. On Saturday, we will do a run (I selected 5K but maybe I'll be ready for the 10K by then) and on Sunday a 70 mile bike ride.

I had a group of friends do this ride last year and wished I could have participated. Given that this year the date falls on Matthew's death date, and I have several family members and one friend who are in various stages of the cancer continuum of disease and remission, it seemed right.

I hope to do a better job soon of at least doing weekly blog posts. Things have been a little busy up here and the blog has suffered. My parents came to visit and juggling work with Avery out of school is less than ideal and starting tomorrow Ralph will be around even less than normal for about a month... Help! So my apologies and know that the Joyful Girl has not been forgotten. She is just busy and enjoying summer outside!

Click here to donate online! THANKS!

Show Me* the Money!

2011-06-27T16:14:00.001-04:00

And by Me*... I mean sponsor my ride in Ride Aroostook. Their charity this year is Camp Adventure for kids age 12-17 living with Type 1 diabetes. I only need to raise $150 more. Help me, help them... and help yourself - good deed for the day would be done!

Click here: FirstGiving - Your fundraising

Ghost Portraits

2011-06-24T18:33:00.000-04:00

Last night Avery and I had a bonfire. I took some pictures of the fire and was enjoying experimenting with my new camera. It was getting pretty dark, but I wanted to get a picture of Avery. So... I used my knees as a tripod and tried to hold still with the long exposure time required. Avery moved half way through the picture not realizing how long it was going to take. I fussed at her for not sitting still - and then had to eat my words when we got this cool shot!

So then I tried it on myself again with the knee tripod and then doing my best to duck my head out of the shot while not moving my knees. I think the picture is pretty cool. I would love to have a tripod and see what we could come up with.

So I owe Avery a thanks for being fidgety... this is one of those happy accidents!

Agriturismo Mondo Antico: Part 8

2011-06-23T18:05:00.000-04:00

Guinea Pig Babies!

2011-06-20T21:00:00.000-04:00

Clover had her babies today - 3 of them! I discovered them when I came downstairs this morning. I called up to Avery "Clover had her babies!" and she said "Yeah, right. Not falling for it." So five minutes later, Avery finally came downstairs and I was sitting in front of the cage. She rolled her eyes at me, like good job mom trying to fool me, but then when she got to the cage and saw the babies, Avery did a classic big eyes shocked face! So funny.
So we had been hoping to see them being born, but given the "aftermath" all over the bedding, I'm relieved that we didn't see it! The babies were all clean and dry by the time we saw them. There were some initial issues with Clover not wanting them to nurse but all is fine now. Happy mom, happy babies. Hopefully one of the babies is a girl so we can keep one. We know some people that are interested so I'm not too worried about finding homes. And hopefully Crimson's driveway neutering was successful and this won't be happening again!
Avery is in love with all of them and we can't wait for the first 24 hour period to be over so we can pick them up! They do seem to be larger than we expected and had seen online... Clover did seem to be pregnant for a loooong time and was shockingly large, so maybe these babies are more mature than most!

Happy Father's Day!

2011-06-19T13:40:00.000-04:00

For my dad - I thought you wouldn't mind seeing this again. Happy Father's Day! Wish we could all go to a game together!

For Daddy Ralph (and I bet Poppa's gonna like it too!)

(If you get this in an email and the videos don't play, go watch it on the blog itself!)

Agriturismo Mondo Antico: Part 7

2011-06-18T12:28:00.000-04:00

If I had to pick one thing to eat again... I think it would be this meal. This delight was Monday of my trip. That morning at the grocery store I asked my friend if fresh pasta was really that much better than dried. The answer "Fresh is better, of course" and that was it. So later it is time for lunch and out comes fresh homemade pasta by Giuliana the owner of the winery. I couldn't believe it... and was more careful what I asked about. I also wished I had known that she was making fresh pasta for lunch. I would have gone in the kitchen and learned something instead of reading on the patio - though that was good too!

To address the etiquette issue of me reading a book while Giuliana cooked lunch, I TRIED to be helpful from the very minute I arrived in Italy and it was not welcomed! It took an act of Congress to let me clear my own plate one day. They sure know how to treat guests, but I wanted to learn, not just help!

So back to the pasta. It was in the freeform shape you see, with garlic, sage and bacon. SO SO SO good.

The next day I made sure to spend some more time in the kitchen - just watching, no helping! I was floored at how much salt was put in the boiling water. HANDFULS of salt. While the pasta was cooking, she put whole garlic cloves in olive oil and let them cook til soft and a little browned on the outside. Then she threw in some pepperoncino (at home I have been using red pepper flakes) right before adding the truly al dente pasta to the pan to coat.

I have been making it this way at home ever since with a scant palmful of salt. I am eating about 6 whole garlic cloves at a sitting. When cooked this way I haven't had any problems with bad breath... or at least no one has told me I have! They use Barilla spaghetti. With Barilla Plus spaghetti, I cook it for 7 minutes and that's it. Box says 10-11. Nope! We throw in whatever veggies we have around too.

I spent Sunday evening through Tuesday afternoon here at the Agriturismo/Winery in the Pavia Region. They have the winery, a restaurant and a few rooms. They make 3 types of wine, all organic. The white is my all time favorite. I will have a wine related post up at some point. I would LOVE to go back here especially during harvest time. Click on this link to visit the winery's website!

Her new nickname is 'Bar Fight'

2011-06-18T12:05:00.001-04:00

Ave finally lost one of her upper teeth. Hopefully the second isn't far behind!

Birthday Sleepover Menu

2011-06-11T19:43:00.000-04:00

Avery has a friend over to spend the night for her birthday. They spent a lot of time outside. They even independently set-up a flower stand with chairs and a sign: "Flowers for Sale - Free" and on the back "Sold out. Be right back." They had 2 very nice older lady neighbors come over who insisted on paying them. I told them the flowers had to be free because it was a gift from nature that should be shared out of generosity not greed. Buuuuttttt..... they were allowed to accept donations. Two other bouquets were a bit forcefully given to two walkers! It was hilarious good times.

Then we had a make your own pizza party. The girls went very traditional with pepperoni. It turns out Avery's guest isn't a big pizza fan but after she took a bite she said we would do pizza night every week at my house and she had to be invited. My delicious pizza is the one in the picture. Toppings are (drumroll please) scant layer of cheese, mushrooms, red peppers, whole garlic cloves (that's how I roll these days) and basil from the garden.

In case you don't follow me on twitter, you have missed out on a few poor-me updates regarding my current health situation. I am currently slowly recovering from tonsillitis/strep torture. I think loss of appetite should go along with intense throat pain. So I was only able to eat one piece since swallowing is still an incredible act of will. It was so good and hopefully tomorrow I will be much improved.

For dessert, Avery wanted brownie sundaes. We took her to the store this morning and said she could pick out any toppings she wanted. Her choices: magic shell topping, junior mints, maraschino cherries, jelly beans, whipped topping, marshmallows. I'm still working on maturing her culinary instincts... When we got home I made homemade ice-cream and brownies. The picture shows the deliciousness that was just enjoyed.

Goooooo Birthdays!

Happy 7th Birthday, Avery!

2011-06-11T09:58:00.000-04:00

Birthday sweater from Great-Mimi!

The Jumping Bean

Glamour Shot!

Crimson goes to 1st grade!

2011-06-10T10:55:00.001-04:00

He was a big hit!

Spent the morning in the garden and the afternoon kayaking down the Aroostook!

2011-06-05T16:29:00.001-04:00

peppers, basil, mint, asparagus, lettuce, carrots, snow peas, green beans, zucchini (not shown)

Glad the river is close!

2011-06-05T12:25:00.001-04:00

If you can't figure out this picture, that's because I doubt this has been done before! My kayak is resting on the dash of the CRV and sticking out the back glass window. And I am in the passenger seat, laying flat under my kayak posting this from my phone! Haha.

That's one way to deal with it!

2011-06-05T11:59:00.002-04:00

Ralph had just finished talking to Avery about her negativity/complaining this morning... then she went to get dressed for an outing and came back like this. Too funny!

On the News Again...

2011-06-02T14:24:00.000-04:00

This is a news clip about a new fundraising cycling weekend in our area. And yes I am in it. And no, I am not happy to see you, that really is a banana in my pocket.

Ride Aroostook News Clip

My lovely girl.

2011-05-31T21:35:00.000-04:00

As Avery is nearing her 7 year birthday, her "kidness" is overwhelming. Luckily, she still climbs into bed with me every morning for a snuggle. The other morning I almost couldn't reconcile her with the baby that used to be curled on my chest. I miss the little baby but I am enjoying the kid so much. Our conversations are varied and interesting. Her emotional maturity is progressing by leaps and bounds. I wouldn't have thought it possible, but I love her more and more!

There is no downside to being my friend.

2011-05-30T19:18:00.001-04:00

Feast your eyes on this oreo crust cheesecake with chocolate raspberry sauce glory. Oh yeah...

Oltre Il Colle: Part 6

2011-05-29T16:10:00.000-04:00

On Sunday afternoon, I was out taking pictures around the farm again and was asked if I wanted to see where the family's water came from. This sounded simple enough and mildly interesting. Ok! So we walked up the mountain behind the farm for a bit and then came to this: a metal gate into the side of a mountain. Dark dark tunnel. Hmmm.... I do have to confess that I did start formulating the Italian sentence "Are you going to kill me?" And to make it even worse, the gate didn't even open and I had to crawl through where the bars were missing. At this point, I decided to keep my question to myself and... just pray.

A large flashlight took care of the dark problem and I kept my claustrophobia in check with deep breathing. The story of the mines was very interesting. The ceilings were no more than 5 feet tall... so with a mildly uncomfortable stooped stance, we made our way along the railroad tracks and I learned that the tunnels were all excavated (wrong word I am sure) by hand as they searched for minerals. The tunnels went FAR into the mountain and branched off in many directions. Sometimes up, sometimes down. Very impressive! The railroad like track was for a cart that was pushed along the tunnels to remove rock/minerals.

So the stooped stance went from mildly to quite uncomfortable with how far we walked into the mountain, but it was all worth it! The picture with the ladder shows the water source. The water is dammed up and goes for kilometers. This water comes from inside the mountain, is completely pure and never runs out. There is a rusted old ladder in it, but hey, I didn't get sick!

Now all we had to do was turn around and walk back out. A few steps and click. The flashlight went out. I took a really deep breath at this point! The flashlight would go back on for a couple seconds and then turn off again. I was asked "Hai paura?" multiple times (which means "Are you scared?") and I answered "No, no... É bene"... but mentally thinking Sì!!! Sì!!! Io muerto qui!!! (In moments of stress my Italian goes from bad to worse and a little spanish gets thrown in.) Thank goodness for technology. By the light of a cell phone held 2 feet off the ground, we gingerly picked our way through the tunnel, avoiding the down shafts and various construction debris, etc. This took a looooong time, or at least it felt like it did. All the sudden I felt some cool air and then the can't-see-your-hand-in-front-of-your-face darkness started to lift. I have never been so glad to squeeze myself through a doggie door in an old Italian rusted gate in my life!

The family's electricity is also off the grid and I got a tour of that process next. They use another waterfall/mountain source that is pressurized as it makes its way down to the blue thing in the picture that has cone shaped parts in it that get spun really fast. The water exits out of that orange tube and rejoins nature. This free system makes 8kw/hr. I was told this is enough for 2-3 families. I am guessing that is not 2-3 American families!

So in summary, the water was excellent, the electricity was noisy and the experience memorable... and if I ever do need to hide a body, I know just the place!

Bergamo: Part 5

2011-05-25T22:15:00.000-04:00

I like this door.

funiculare

After the little town, I went to a few bike shops but will spare you the pictures I took of Italian bikes. They probably wouldn't make you as giddy as they do me! I saw so many cyclists... and if Euro driving is a sport, I can't imagine what Euro cycling would be called. Those people be bold.

So late Saturday afternoon, I got to wander around Bergamo. This town is about 45 minutes east of Milan. The old part of the town is up on the hill and called the high city (Città Alta). You can drive up or take a funiculare (foo-nik-you-lah-ray) which is like a trolley. Bergamo is really beautiful. There is an impressive rock wall that surrounds the high city with beautiful arches where the roads enter. It was really crowded with people walking around. I hoped that most of them were not Italians... I felt kind of silly taking pictures of everything... but apparently most of them were Italians and I was informed that I was obviously American, so with nothing to lose, I just proudly sported my big old tourist camera and there you go!

Dried mushrooms, fruits, vegetables.

Speaking of feeling very not-from-there, not having anyone to speak fluent English with for five days and trying desperately to figure out and follow local customs was... intense. I had expected more of a relaxing experience and obviously underestimated the challenge of living in another culture. But that is another blog post, that I probably will never write. I didn't want to leave Italy but I was really happy when I met up with my English-speaking Suisse friend, happy to see her of course and overjoyed to talk and listen to full speed English.

view from inside the funiculare

I hope you enjoy these pictures of Bergamo. It is not one of the well-known popular tourist destinations but it would be a really nice place to spend a couple days!

Cibo Bello... sigh.

Dinner reservations were at 9pm. I never did get used to the meal times there... At the restaurant I watched two men make pizza, throwing the dough up in the air and pulling pizzas in and out of a brick oven. I had really good pizza Friday night, so on Saturday I ordered risotto with salmon and asparagus and then a fish sampler. Before my trip, I read online that Italian desserts look better than they taste. I can't really speak to that because for the most part I was too full after dinner to eat dessert. The beautiful part is definitely true though. At the farm in Oltre Il Colle I did have some incredible tiramisu. Best ever.

I should have tried this.

Sorry this post is a bit scattered... and I am having trouble getting the pictures where I want, but I have to go to bed now. I have already been back almost 3 weeks and have only posted pictures through the first 2 days of my trip!

Secondo Piatto

Near Oltre Il Colle: Part 4

2011-05-24T22:15:00.001-04:00

On Saturday (I think), my Italian host had to meet with a Catholic priest regarding an upcoming confirmation in the family. I was questioned multiple times by several people about my religious affiliation and it was swiftly determined that I could not enter the church - but there was still time for me to convert. (Phew.) I would have loved to take pictures inside the church but I enjoyed the time alone to wander around this small town. I would love to tell you the name of this town but I don't think I ever knew it. It was the small town with priest.

The mirror photo with sky background is the first and basically only decent photographic evidence of me in Italy. The mirror was there to help tiny cars careen even faster around the curves with the distorted promise of a clear road. European driving is a sport unlike any I have ever seen.

I took lots of pictures in this place, close ups of buildings and doors and flowers and and and... it is hard to pick a few. But there are some later days with better doors and flowers, so I won't overwhelm you now. I do love this line of trees. It was outside a cemetery. Many of the trees had been pruned severely and this new growth spring explosion was everywhere. My favorite part of this little town was the rock walls along the road that had masses of yellow flowers. Not everything in Italy is beautiful. I saw run down houses, goodness entire rundown towns and graffiti and trash... but even so, I was continually amazed at how much beauty there was in the basic structure of things - the roads, the sidewalks, the walls. There was even an ugly video camera/doorbell outside someone's gate that had been somewhat disguised by being built into a metal frame with scrolls and such.

I had walked and walked and was just about to put my camera away when I came across this. Mom - this water fountain snake's for you! Water out of a snake tastes... well, not quite right!

(Reminder: I size all of these pictures as small so they take up less of my free space allocation on blogger. However, remember that you can always right-click (or just click?) to open them up bigger in another window. If you get this through email, I have no idea what happens. If you can't view them bigger, then just go to the actual blog and do it.)

The Ninny is in the Paper: "Loose dogs, cyclist can be a dangerous mix"

2011-05-21T14:25:00.000-04:00

My friend Loretta was injured by a dog on a recent bike ride and took to facebook to get her story and frustration out. Loose dogs are my biggest issue with cycling and when she asked me to talk to a report from the Bangor Daily News, I was happy to do it. The link below should go to the story online. The quotes are accurate-ish, but they make me sound like a wimp! Oh well, when it comes to barking violent missiles of canine hell, I guess I am. So when I ride by myself, there are 3 or so loops from my house that are consistently dog free. When I go with other people, I will go anywhere and the other rider is my "blocker".

Loose Dogs and Cycling

Oltre Il Colle: Part 3

2011-05-18T12:00:00.028-04:00

The first day I arrived in Italy, I went on a walk up in the mountains around the farm. It was so beautiful. I was so tired but being outside was exactly what I needed after being in 4 airplanes for 17 hours.

Near the path was an old home that was slowly being taken back by nature. There was a little tree growing out of this second story window!

Near the house was the furnace the family used to make terracotta. It was also two stories tall and you can still see the orange staining on the rocks.

The air was much more humid than I expected. Maybe southern Italy is drier but I was in northern. Not humid like NC in July but still... My hair never got quite as straight as I wanted it - which also resulted in not having any picture of myself there that I really like!

The hillside picture shows the steep hill that the farm is nestled on. The cherry tree was in full bloom. The hill was so steep that to climb parts of it required gripping the grass like rungs of a ladder. Inside the old stone building next to the tree, I saw this basket. I expected the story to be "this was used a long long time ago". Wrong! These are the very baskets they currently use to cut the grass on the hillside back by hand and then either feed the hay to the animals or use it for bedding. The picture only shows a small portion of this hill. It really was incredibly steep... I am not sure that I would trust myself to be on it for long periods of time, let alone with a non-ergonomical backpack and a scythe!

The Avett Brothers: The Weight of Lies

2011-05-17T21:34:00.000-04:00

The following video and lyrics are from my new favorite song. My trip to Italy was a great experience and has left me with many things to ponder about myself and life. One phrase that stayed with me on my trip was "wherever you go, there you are". I was in Italy: speaking Italian, eating new foods (octopus anyone?), no child to take care of... basically an unrecognizable few days - but I was utterly and inescapably myself.

So enjoy this song and wherever you are - run to something and not away from.

Disappear from your hometown / Go and find the people that you know
Show them all of your good parts / Leave town when the bad parts start to show
Go and wed a woman / A pretty girl that you’ve never met
Make sure she knows you love her well / But don’t make any other promises

The weight of lies will bring you down / And follow you to every town
Cause nothing happens here that doesn’t happen there
So when you run make sure you run / To something and not away from
Cause lies don’t need an aeroplane to chase you anywhere

I once heard the worse thing / A man could do is draw a hungry crowd
Tell everyone his name with pride, and confidence / But leaving out his doubt
I’m not sure I bought those words / When I was young I knew most everything
These words have never meant so much to anyone / As they now mean to me

The weight of lies will bring you down / And follow you to every town
Cause nothing happens here that doesn’t happen there
So when you run make sure you run / To something and not away from
Cause lies don’t need an aeroplane to chase you down

Oltre Il Colle: Cheese-making

2011-05-13T13:33:00.000-04:00

The farm I stayed at primarily made cheese. They had lots of cows and the associated milking... but nothing like the technology based mass production here. There may have been 1 automatic milker for over 30 cows... it must have mostly been done by hand.

The first picture shows the big copper pot where they cooked the milk. Then you can see the cheese in the molds. Once it sets, it goes in the salt bath tub... Not sure what is on the side of the tub, but maybe that is part of the flavor which was superb! I definitely learned that we are far too uptight about refrigerating things here. The cheese is just left out all the time. I ate it. I didn't get sick. Guess it is fine!

The last picture shows a cellar type room where they let the cheese and salami age. They know how old it is just by pressing on the rounds. I considered leaving behind most of my clothes so I could fit one of these rounds in my suitcase, but then I would have been naked... and bloated from excess dairy consumption. Sanity prevailed.

Mi piace molto questo formaggio!!!

(I really like this cheese!!!)

Italy: Oltre Il Colle, near Bergamo-ish

2011-05-10T19:23:00.000-04:00

The first two days in Italy were spent at a small farm out in the country. They were up in the mountains past 3 small towns, outside of Bergamo, Italy. The views were incredible. The weather was quite changeable. There was lots of exploring of the farm and a couple great hikes.

The kitchen had a regular electric stove, but it seemed like a lot of the cooking was done on this actual wood stove... and some really delicious meals came out of this kitchen. Pasta, pasta, pasta and a roast and polenta with cream that was way better than I thought polenta could be!

I was incredibly fortunate to see this side of Italy... family farm in the country, quite traditional it seemed. A couple big family dinners were true cultural experiences. The women served the men first and then ate. Italians really do say "Mamma Mia!" It was raucous and there was an abundance of food and wine. Perfetto!

Go fly a tie!

2011-04-30T20:06:00.002-04:00

Ralph's first child labor candidate for his fly tying business.

Pictures for Matthew

2011-04-29T20:01:00.002-04:00

At Matthew's memorial service, we were given a bulb for every day of his life.

I planted them in a circle at the base of our stairs.

They are beautiful!

Let the Adventure Begin...

2011-04-28T11:00:00.016-04:00

Thursday morning... I am on my first flight now heading to Italy!

Here is a picture of a meal I made last week. Pasta, cream, fresh asparagus, garlic, wine for the cook... I was trying to get in the Italian mood (l'umore italiano) and it worked!

Now for the real thing.

More to come...

Preparations

2011-04-22T13:45:00.000-04:00

Yesterday it was snowing, about 6 inches of those huge cottonball snowflakes that come to visit in the spring in these parts. All around me people were complaining. I understand their frustration. The day before I had run next to Avery on a bike ride - in a tanktop. The seasons here do not transition smoothly. 2 steps forward, 1 snowboot step back. Now, I am not a saint who never complains about the weather. I just didn't feel the need to do it yesterday. 1) I was excited that I had something else to practice taking pictures of. I have a weak spot for icicles and our house gets tons of them. 2) I have lived in the desert and have an appreciation for the gift of precipitation no matter the form. And 3), next week I will be in Italy so it could snow 3 feet here and I could keep the perma-smile I have been sporting.

The trip preparations are coming along fine. I am the opposite of a procrastinator... still can't come up with a great term for that - concrastinator would seem a natural opposite but sounds like an old-fashioned kitchen appliance. My global capable loaner phone arrived yesterday. (I will have it for emergencies and 1 international rate text check-in with Ralph a day. The I-haven't-been-kidnapped-or-decided-to-never-return text...) My bag is out and I have started accumulating the necessities. Last night I dreamt that I forgot my passport... so that got dropped in there first thing this morning! Travel size bottles and flight details are ready. My Italian vocabulary is coming along pretty well thanks to signing up at www.babble.com for 1 month. Other than booking the trip, that was the best decision I have made so far. I can't wait to embarrass myself with my clumsy attempts. At Ralph's brilliant suggestion, I am trying to trick jet lag and at least partially switch time zones before I leave. I am about half way there. I am naturally waking up at 5. My hope is to get up by 3 or 4 by next week.

With most of that stuff well in hand, I am left to contemplate the emotional preparations. I got very nervous a couple days ago and had a pretty miserable 24 hour-long What was I thinking??? moment. But I rode it out and reminded myself that my goals for the trip are quite simple: eat, take pictures and get a little bit lost. How could I possibly fail? (Spare me the insights as to how messed up I am that I worry about failing at a vacation. Trust me, I know.)

I just want to do normal stuff while I am there. I have no "must see" checklist. In a perfect world, I would go for 6 months and just be. My hope is that some time during the 4 flights it will take to get there, I can take advantage of my compartmentalized personality and disconnect from my regular life. Let go of my daily obligations, concerns about missing Avery, work that is piling up, and just wipe myself clean. Clean and ready for the sights, sounds, smells of anything and everything that is new and different. I will treasure all these moments... Let the adventure begin - in 5 days!!!

New Camera Experimentation

2011-04-22T12:06:00.009-04:00

These were taken with my refurbished Nikon P100. I am having a lot of fun playing with it. Hopefully I will be comfortable enough to get great pictures in Italy. My love of macro photography will insure that you all get really close pictures of food! I will do my best to take in the big picture...

First "Fish"

2011-04-20T16:04:00.000-04:00

The subject line for this is correct if fish is a verb - not a noun! I guess with the icebergs still moving downriver expectations were low. Still a beautiful day to be out!

New Camera, Familiar Model!

2011-04-20T16:00:00.000-04:00

My cutie patootie

Here are Avery's eyes at about half-crossed. Full-crossed gives me the full blown shivers.

An object in motion stays in motion...

Avery thought it was cool that you could see my outline in her eyes.

Saturday Plans Gone Awry

2011-04-16T08:45:00.000-04:00

Planning to take Ave on a bike ride around the pond in a bit... Just found this in the living room. I already told her I would run next to her the whole time and if she fell and there was blood I would take her for ice-cream. I will not be swayed by her desperate pleas to God and shameless attempt to sway me. I SAID WE ARE GOING AND WE ARE! LOL!

Oh how I missed thee.

2011-04-10T19:33:00.001-04:00

FWD:Productivity!

2011-04-10T19:32:00.001-04:00

This is what happens when the husband is helpful and the daughter is happy. Ralph also got in a run in addition to our bike rides. Go us!

Ave does skinny jeans

2011-03-29T20:13:00.001-04:00

...so after trying to sit "criss cross" she decided it wasn't such a good idea!

2011-03-22T11:22:00.000-04:00

Avery was selected to be in a regional art show. She was 1 of 2 first graders at her school. Last week, we went to the family reception together. She was so excited to show us what she had made. It is a picture of the Dawn Treader from the 3rd Chronicles of Narnia book (and yes movie). There is a really cute little Reepicheep on the ship deck.

Avery at Youth Ski Day

2011-03-21T11:18:00.002-04:00

Avery getting a little help back up the hill! She did a great job at Youth Ski Day. She far surpassed all expectations even before she went down a pretty steep hill like a little bullet 3 times. I expect great progress will be made next year! The day when she can ski with me can't come soon enough!

Meet our Guinea Pigs: Crimson and Clover

2011-03-20T16:03:00.000-04:00

Avery at the pet store with Clover. She didn't want to give her back. We went back a couple days later and bought them.

Snuggly!

Clover at the top. Crimson at the bottom. Her hair is exactly the color of Avery's! We hold them in towels because they pee and poop everywhere.

Crimson on the left. Clover on the right. This is in their cage. Once I can get better pictures of the whole cage process, I will post a how-to. We made a really big cage for them... but they are still so scared, they just huddle in the corner under blankets.

Fun with a heating vent!

2011-03-11T15:48:00.001-05:00

Orange Chicken Cous Cous

2011-03-03T18:47:00.001-05:00

I love this dinner. It is another one pan wonder!

Senator Collins at our Library

2011-02-26T10:00:00.000-05:00

Senator Collins came to our library to celebrate its 100th year anniversary. She read a book to the children and asked them about their favorite books. During the book, the word scoff was used. She asked if anyone knew what it meant. Ave's little hand shot right up and she said "It means... I mean, uh... it means to make fun of?" That's my girl! I think Ave is looking adorably nervous in this photo. She let me straighten her hair... in exchange for wearing lip gloss. It made sense to her.

I forced her to wear her sweatshirt with peace signs shaped like hearts on it. She didn't think political statements were necessary but I sure got a kick out of it!

Go peace! Go books! Go Avery!

I am going to Italy and can't stop smiling.

2011-02-25T12:42:00.001-05:00

2 months until I fly to Italy! I will channel my nerves into learning as much Italian as possible between now and then. I wish my photographic memory worked as well for auditory exercises.
These are the resources I could find at the local library. I might order Italian for Dummies because that is what trying to learn another language makes me feel like!

Happy Birthday to Meeeeeee! (aka S'More Pie)

2011-02-24T11:25:00.004-05:00

So having a birthday would be a great time to write about growing older and re-examing priorities and blah blah blah.

Listen, I read the book Eat Pray Love and all I learned is that I just need to Eat.

I hadn't settled on a birthday dessert and then ran across this guy called the PieCycle who delivers pies on his bike late at night to somewhere not where I live.

And one of his tweets mentioned s'more pies. Some decisions are easy.

There are lots of great recipes online and of course the ones with made from scratch marshmallows are probably the best...

but it was my birthday, so I found the easiest one I could.

And it was very easy.

And there was no stage in which you could not lick a bowl. (Dessert Serving #1)

I made and baked a graham cracker crust.

Then there is a chocolate and sweetened condensed milk layer.

Then you put marshmallows on top of that and brown them in the oven.

Really easy.

And while you are doing that, your daughter makes up a craft that involves marshmallows so she can then bat her eyes at you and ask if she can eat them.
"But Mo-om, it is art!" She did make the football person marshmallow version of me with straight hair.

That kid is on the ball.

Here it is after I got the cheesecake pan off while trying to leave as much of the pie on the cheesecake liner as possible. (Dessert Serving #2)

Ralph made Taco Salad for my birthday dinner and the only reason I was able to limit myself to one helping was because this beauty was in front of us.

Waiting...

Wanting...

Wooing...

After some impressively off-key singing, we were able to finally enjoy dessert (or Dessert Serving #3).

Ah my slice of campfire joy, you make me smile.

After Ralph finished his piece, he looked at me and said "Please take the rest to work tomorrow. For the love of all that is healthy and self-controlled, please have mercy." Given the amount of finger licking I did while making it, sharing it outside of the family didn't seem hygienically respectful , but I did put the rest in the freezer for a rainy day!